Wednesday, July 27, 2011

So this is where is all begins: The origin.

It all starts out with a stork pelican space pelican. He flies using the dark energy and electromagnetic radiation to pull him in directions in which he desires. He is on a mission, a mission to bring one child space-baby to a planet called Earth. It should be raised without knowing her true origin in life, and to end up creating an absurd story just as this one. He approaches the Eagle Nebula and soars through to the Pillars of Creation. I'm really not okay with this pelican not having a name. I'll name him Bunny. Bunny takes the one chosen space-baby and puts her into his throat pouch. Is there really no other name for that? No? Okay. Little did the space baby know, that her journey was not going to be a simple one.

After flying through the celestial body of Outer Space, Bunny and Space-Baby make their way through the Milky Way to find the Solar System. They should really rename that. After a dusty battle with the rings of Saturn and the bumpy road through the meteor belt, they find Earth. Bunny says his final goodbye to Space-Baby by regurgitating her into a cooler into the ocean. So alone in the Pacific Ocean, Space-Baby floats and dances along the waves in a cooler three sizes too big. I don't know why size is relevant. Before the loneliness sets in Club Cooler, a large tentacled being wraps the tip of his arm around the cooler and travels with Space-Baby in Club Cooler, which is like a personal boombox through all of the oceans of Earth to find the perfect set of parents to drop the Space-Baby off to.

22 years later, Space-Baby is now renamed to Lauren Elyse, and spending the beginning of her early childhood in a Boombox Cooler, she is now a 24/7 dance party with an obsession with Octopi, and likes watching pelican regurgitate. It's like taboo porn.

I give you this blog. Just a generic daily works of daily life. Possible crazy stories and possible sweet little things. This is a place for me: to write, to remember.